How To Lose to the Brady-Less Patriots in 10 Steps

Step 1: Miss a 31 yard field goal in the first quarter, after a long drive down the field to start the game.
Step 2: Get penalized 6 times for a total of 60 yards on mental errors like, 12 men on the field, twice.
Step 3: Give the Patriots great field position on every one of their drives.
Step 4: Start on your own 20 yard line on every one of your drives.
Step 5: Trade for a hall of fame quarterback in the off-season and then don't use him on all three downs from the 5 yard line in the red zone when trying to take the lead.
Step 6: Punt the ball out of bounds.
Step 7: Throw an interception.
Step 8: Drop key passes.
Step 9: Let a quarterback who has not started a meaningful game since 1999, while he was in high school, beat your defense with slant passes and short routes.
Step 10: Maintain your status as Bill Belichick's Bitch.